As I begin my 4th day of torture, I am compelled to write an
angry letter to JM.
Dear Jillian,
I hate you. This morning as I hobbled over to my computer, the painful knots in my calves screaming, I had to wonder. Are you trying to kill me?
Thanks to your crunches, my ribs are so tender that it hurts to laugh. (Fortunately, that's not much of a problem since you came into my life.)
Last night as I was applying ice packs and Bio-freeze to my throbbing muscles, inspiration (desperation?)hit me right between my poor bloodshot eyes and I knew I had found a way out of your high-impact-hell!
"This is probably the kind of work out that I should ease into," I thought. "Maybe tomorrow I should take a break. If I workout just 3 or 4 days a week, I'll be done in less than 3 months. After all, what's the rush?"
Since I am blogging, I have to stick to the rules. After a few minutes of online research I learned what you already know. (Sh*t)
You expect me to complete your "30 Day Shred" in 30 days! In a row. No breaks? Are you insane?
Okay. I know you have your reasons. You feed me the same spoonful of granola laced BS every morning: "I know this is hard, but when we make a promise to change your body in thirty days, we have to make sure we deliver results!"
Okay Jillian. Here are my stats from day one:
Weight: 115.6 lb
Waist: 3O in
Hips: 35 in
BFP: 20.5
So let's see if you make good on your promise to deliver me a new body. (I'm pretty sure it was less painful when my OB/GYN delivered me a new baby.)
And one more thing. Either you can't count or you're a big fibber. I set my stopwatch at the beginning of my last two '20 Minute' torture sessions and just as I suspected, your workout ran long!
In fact, your daily effort to kill me actually takes you over 27 minutes.
Gotcha!
Loath you very much,
Toning and Groaning
angry letter to JM.
Dear Jillian,
I hate you. This morning as I hobbled over to my computer, the painful knots in my calves screaming, I had to wonder. Are you trying to kill me?
Thanks to your crunches, my ribs are so tender that it hurts to laugh. (Fortunately, that's not much of a problem since you came into my life.)
"This is probably the kind of work out that I should ease into," I thought. "Maybe tomorrow I should take a break. If I workout just 3 or 4 days a week, I'll be done in less than 3 months. After all, what's the rush?"
Since I am blogging, I have to stick to the rules. After a few minutes of online research I learned what you already know. (Sh*t)
You expect me to complete your "30 Day Shred" in 30 days! In a row. No breaks? Are you insane?
Okay. I know you have your reasons. You feed me the same spoonful of granola laced BS every morning: "I know this is hard, but when we make a promise to change your body in thirty days, we have to make sure we deliver results!"
Okay Jillian. Here are my stats from day one:
Weight: 115.6 lb
Waist: 3O in
Hips: 35 in
BFP: 20.5
So let's see if you make good on your promise to deliver me a new body. (I'm pretty sure it was less painful when my OB/GYN delivered me a new baby.)
And one more thing. Either you can't count or you're a big fibber. I set my stopwatch at the beginning of my last two '20 Minute' torture sessions and just as I suspected, your workout ran long!
In fact, your daily effort to kill me actually takes you over 27 minutes.
Gotcha!
Loath you very much,
Toning and Groaning
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